Not too long ago, I went through a season of insecurity and self- doubt. I found myself questioning whether the characteristics, talents, and value I brought was something that God could use. The once feisty advocate for what I knew to be true was sheepishly quiet and submissive. I could feel my confidence draining right out of me. I wondered what had happened to the confidence I once had. Was it false confidence, one made of pride because I was at the peak of my “success”? Maybe I had been just lucky and I really wasn’t that “good.” I could hear my self-talk agreeing with the lies. I was spiraling down a bad path and I wasn’t sure how to get from underneath. I knew it wasn’t healthy and definitely wasn’t from God. The enemy had found a weak link.
During this time, my grandson asked me to find Bible Man for him to watch and then invited me to watch along with him. As I sat holding him on my lap, I watched as Bible Man was equipped for battle against the enemy with the armor of God. As we watched each episode, the enemy always attacked with a lie, and Bible Man, dressed in the full armor, defeated the enemy with the Word of God. In one particular episode, a trance had been placed over the children, and they were exceptionally argumentative and mean spirited. Bible Man came to the rescue, and using the Word of God, destroyed the trance and took down the enemy’s lies. He had won the battle.
As I sat there watching this with him, I began to draw some correlation between what I was experiencing and what the story was saying. I didn’t have Bible Man to win my battle, but I did have the Armor of God…
Later that night I pulled out my bible and looked up Ephesians 6:10-18 and began to study and unpack what God was telling me through scripture. I asked God to forgive me for believing the lie. I thanked Him for using a child to show me spiritual truth and asked Him to heal my weak link and to use me.
Friends, Ephesians 6:10-18 instructs us to be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. (And friend, He IS MIGHTY!) We are to put on the full armor of God so that we can take our stand against the devil’s schemes. (For me, it was a lack of confidence, insecurity, and self-doubt). This struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world, and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. (Ladies, this is REAL!) I knew that the insecurities that I was feeling and how it was stopping me from doing what God had called me to do was NOT FROM God! Your lies are not either. When we are being fed a lie, we need to put on the full armor of God, so that we can stand our ground. (Not today, Satan!) 🙅🏼♀️
God tells us to stand firm…with the belt of truth buckled around our waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with our feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, we are to take up the shield of faith, with which we can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. (Those arrows were making me weak and binding me up, and they are to you too!) We are to take up the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the Word of God. And we pray. Pray in the Spirit …on all occasions… with all kinds of prayers and requests.
This was how I was going to fight the lies, but I also knew that I needed to take my thoughts captive and “still” the outside world. I guarded the influences of the outside world very closely- I knew that particular things, situations, and even people could negatively influence me so I needed to separate from that so I could hear God. I also began to write down the things that God was telling me that were good, special and unique about me – how He had made me to be and do exactly what He is calling me to do. I knew that wanting to be something or someone different was against God, so I began to celebrate and accept who I am.
I remember one time I was in a meeting and ideas were just popping out of my co-workers’ mouths (they looked so impressive!). I felt myself begin to slip into the lie that I was not as impressive as they were. I knew the truth… I knew that I was just as good at what I do, but I am different. I am a processor and thinker, and I need to think and process information before I can give my “impressive ideas.” That is an amazing quality that God has given me. I found such great peace in that TRUTH!
I’m thinking about you today. What lie is the enemy wanting you to believe? Maybe he is trying to convince you that you are not good enough, smart enough or that the value you bring to the table is too small. That is a lie! You were made for great things. God has given you exactly what you need to be exactly who He needs you to be. The enemy desires to disarm you and make you weak. When your confidence is weak you are more likely to shy away from your calling. But friend, do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You NEED to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what He has promised! (Hebrews 10:35-36)
Together we are building Kingdom lives and Living for the King!
~ Kimber
Photo by Jandré van der Walt on Unsplash